One harmless thought can turn my mind into a terrifying place. Have you ever been there?
Innocently, you are working out in your head how things might play out; suddenly, you find yourself tailspinning as if the worst-case scenario already happened. You may have started the conversation with God in prayer about "said situation", only to find yourself seemingly alone in your thoughts on how you are going to navigate it. Maybe it's just me, but I have a hunch I'm not alone.
Jesus says: 'Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.' Matthew 6:34 ( click here and read the whole thing Matthew 6:25-34)
'Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.' Philippians 4:6-7
'A man’s heart plans his way, But the Lord directs his steps.' Proverbs 16:9
These scriptures are not incantations to ward away all worry and anxiousness. They are God's Words, hidden in our hearts to remind our weary souls of truth and how to live this side of Eden. Life will go on; we will move from the waiting place into God's next steps for our lives. Experience His faithfulness. Then once again we will find ourselves sitting and wondering how God will work out our current circumstances.
I don't think God expects us not to wonder. In fact, I think he hopes we will wonder and continue to turn those thoughts into conversations with Him. Talking with Him daily, surrendering our hopes, dreams, and fears, praising and trusting Him for the outcome.
Wondering is good, it means we are thinking and considering our path. We put together in our minds scenarios that we think would be wise and good. The key is how we respond when God has an entirely different plan from our own. This is when our wonder can wander into worry. God in His kindness gave us the dignity of free will, He expects us to make decisions. Everyday. Some are large and impactful and some are seemingly insignificant, "I'll have the grande, no wait. The Venti. Thank You".
We wonder well, when we invite God into the wondering. When it's an open conversation. Much like sitting in the passenger seat of a car. The driver has the control, we might be in the front seat able to see what's happening, yet the driver has a different perspective. They might have looked ahead and noticed a traffic jam, or have experience driving that path, know a short cut, or the scenic route. Maybe they know the best secret place to stop for lunch. We can make suggestions and requests for things we'd like to see and do, but we aren't driving the end results.
Why do I still worry?
I'll be honest, I'm not always happy with God's plan. Sometimes in my own ignorance, I don't like it at all. I look at Moses walking in albeit, some resistant obedience. Setting his people free sounded like a great plan, God made concessions for his fears and shortcomings promising to go with them. Then it drug on. Oh, how he must have wondered and possibly worried. Can you relate?
Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane asked God 3 times to remove the cup of suffering, but it was the only way. He walked a painful obedience to give us freedom. The perfect example sat and wondered with God the Father if there was another way. He did not wander into worry, just stepped into painful surrender.
I'm writing this not because I have it right but because I'm working on it. It's incredibly comforting to read these words of Paul:
'For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do. If, then, I do what I will not to do, I agree with the law that it is good. But now, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find. For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice. Now if I do what I will not to do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. I find then a law, that evil is present with me, the one who wills to do good. For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man. But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? I thank God—through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, with the mind I myself serve the law of God, but with the flesh the law of sin
How then shall we wonder and not wander to worry?
I want to remind you that you are human, and God created you with emotions. Emotions aren't bad, they are indicators of how we are coping with a fallen but redeemed world. God promises to be with us. Sometimes the answers come quick and easy, like a breath of fresh air. God rushes in and we feel the immediate rescue! Not worried today? Be vigilant. Your enemy prowls like a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour.
Next time my mind wanders from wondering to worrying, I'm going to get into conversation with Him about everything I'm wondering about. I'm going to tell him what I need, thank Him for what He has done. Then His Peace will uphold me while I trust Him wether I'm making decisions or navigating unexpected twists and turns!