Episode 19- My shaky hands and how God has used it to help me rely on His strength
My Shaky Hands and how God has used it to help me rely on His Strength.
Breaking down the idol of self image learning when I am weak He is strong. If you know me, or you have watched any video I’ve made online you may have noticed a tremor in my hands.
I get asked about it, often to my chagrin.
About the time I hit puberty my Mom noticed my hands shaking, not constantly but it was there. I was an active healthy child, but still she wanted to get me checked.
The doctors confirmed after many tests that it was a benign tremor. He said, “when you get older a glass of wine will probably help”. I’ve lived with it for nearly 28 years and it’s still at times frustrating and embarrassing. I suppose it’s why God wanted me to do a Podcast on it.
My resistance and pride was proof I needed to humbly share
As I was preparing my, “Body Image Series” on the Podcast I heard the Lord prompt my heart, “Talk about your shaking”. I dismissed it, again and again. Why you ask? Well, it makes me look weak, and the dang idol of self image is a doozy.
I sat down and recorded the episode and thought I’d record it as a back up, still not totally obedient. Convincing myself nobody would want to hear about my journey with my shaking hands. I questioned wether it really fit in the body image series.
Then one of my scheduled interviews changed, last minute, I had a slot to fill. Again God gently whispered to share it.
Breaking down the idol of self image learning when I am weak He is strong
As I sat there editing I cried, and confessed my pride and resistance. When your pride finally breaks down and you allow the softness and mercy of His love and strength to come in it washes over you so quick.
It’s not like I don’t talk about my shaking to others, or that I haven’t recognized God’s strength upholding me over the years, and helping me do things I never thought I could. I just didn’t want to admit it was an idol of image, or how I had some pride I needed to let go of.
My word of the year
The last few years God has given me a word or words for the year:
- Still- 2018
- Immediate Obedience-2021
Over the year I study whatever word He gives me, in Scripture and what it means to me and society as a whole. I pray over how He is prompting me to understand better. I take note on how it affects my relationship with Him. Each year there has been countless lessons, and whispers to my heart all surrounding the word He gives to me.
I shouldn’t be completely surprised that as I was chatting with God about what word this year was I heard, “Humility”….. Umm…No, it couldn’t possibly be that.
Then again and again, I heard the whisper and saw the word pop out to me in my Bible. I realized He wanted to teach me more about this. He reminded me how the people closest to His heart throughout the Bible, through today practice humility.
We are still at the beginning of this year, I suspect it will be rich in more lessons of humility. For now this was my first one, so I am sharing my heart and my weakness with you. My hope is that it encourages you in your own body image weakness to rely on Christ and demolish the idol of self image.
I pray you will be Blessed by this episode!
Body Image series
I have been doing a body image series this is number 3:
Listen here to #1- Healthy Body image, is it possible?
Listen here to #2 –Getting beyond Physical limitations and stepping into your calling with Guest -Kristin Hamer
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Podcast Music Composed and performed by Jamie Miller
If you would like more information on Jamie’s Song Writing and performing services you can ask Caroline on any of the above platforms listed for her official contact info.